Rowan Grace

I realized I had never written out my experience with Rowan through pregnancy and the birth, so I should probably do that before I forget.  do here goes!

Taylor and I tried for over a year to get pregnant. We were actually thinking about just taking a break if I didn't get pregnant soon. And lo and behold a little before Liam's 2nd birthday, on valentine's day I got a positive pregnancy test. I wanted to have a home birth again, like Liam, so we (by we I mean I) went and found a cool lady in gresham named Kristina who practiced through Vibrant Family Medicine. A naturopathic Dr who did home births. A funny older lady who used to be a mime in New York. Everything was going great until about month 4 of my pregnancy. I'd gotten a really bad sickness and woke up around 2 am with a lot of bleeding. Thankfully the boys were at my mom's while i was sick, so I got taylor up and we went to the er. 5 hours and lots of worry and fatigue and an ultrasound later I found out I'd had a small placental abruption. The placenta was tearing away from the uterus. The dr said there was nothing to be done but wait, but my midwife sent me home later that day with several things to help the internal wound to make sure it got better and to help my flu. In the end Roro was fine and I got better. About 2 months later I got gestational diabetes to which I had to completely switch up my pregnancy diet from just stuffing my face to whatever came in sight to 40 carbs every meal and 20 carb snacks in between. As horrible as it was I ended losing pounds vs gaining more, so win! After a few months of carb counting and me pricking my finger 3X a day it was getting close to my due date. Around the time me and my midwife would start discussing what I needed for the birth, I went in and got my blood pressure tested, a normal process that happens with every checkup. My blood pressure was pretty high. My midwife had me come in a couple days later to check it again and it was still high. The problem with high blood pressure is it stresses the baby and could cause premature birth with the chance of the placenta tearing away too soon leaving me most likely hemorrhaging internally. Worse case me and the baby could die...so it's a pretty scary thing. So my midwife set me up with an appointment with Providence to do a stress test and then determine if I needed to get induced. I was about 2 weeks away from Rowans due date...I think. So I went in, did the test and met some midwives. They were all really nice and caught me up on Providence Birthing. The thing I liked about Providence is they were actually sad I couldn't do a home birth like I wanted. They assured me they'd keep it as 'home like' as possible within the bounds of keeping me and Rowan safe. They even had a Doula who just went from mom to mom seeing of they needed anything. So a few days later I went in for another stress test. I was told they could induce me at any moment, and yes that day was the day I'd have her. My blood pressure was still high so they jabbed a lovely IV in my arm and got me all set up in a nice quiet room. The room I was in had a nice bathroom with a tub I could labor in, but not birth in. They offered a birthing tub option but that just makes me want to throw up. There was also this weird looking thing that looked like a Bowflex workout machine, but it was for birthing. The Doula wandered in and showed me all the things I could do with it, it helps you squat out your baby or birth standing up or squating haha. There was this thing I could pull down to help me 'sway' around. In all it was really weird. Well...the day was pretty smooth. They didn't want to give me Pitocin, a med that starts contractions. I was really glad, the contractions tend to be more intense with Pitocin. They broke my water, I can't remember what time and quickly after that my contractions started coming rather quickly. The midwife kept coming in to check on everything but it seemed to be going slowly. Taylor and I were rushing to let people know it was happening...yet again...early. After about an hour the contractions started to hurt. I asked to soak in the tub, because why not? Warm water. It'd be only me and Taylor. I had never seen midwives, a Doula and a random nurse fly into action so fast. Within minutes I had a warm bath, soft music and L.E.D. candles! They were so nice! I got in the bath and it felt so good! But within minutes the contractions came with a vicious pain. Every few minutes I had to squirm to endure them. I was in the bath for maybe 15 minutes, when I started to get hot and sweaty and wanted to get out. So Taylor got me a towel and I got back in my nightgown. When I came out, my family had gone to get food and the two midwives and the Doula were standing by my bed talking. The main midwife (because the other one was training) started talking to me about how I wanted to have the birth. She was pointing out the weird machine, a birthing ball, the bed, or I could use the bed to just hold onto. I was in the middle of telling her how I just like to lay down (lol) when a sharp contraction hit me out of nowhere and I felt rowan drop past my pelvic bone, a solid 2 inches at least! The weirdest feeling I'd ever felt. Then the all to wonderful feeling of having to pass the biggest poop ever! I gritted my teeth, grabbed the bed and said "ok. She's coming!" Yet again, all these women were a blur. The Doula ran and grabbed random things, the trainee got medical supplies and the midwife helped me get on the bed so she could look at my vagina (ha). I heard her yell "here's the head! It's happening!" I went through a contraction, and the the midwife said I could push whenever and I was like...oh oops, I thought we were waiting for something. So within 15 minutes, and one more contraction she was out! They handed her right to me, a sticky semi pale blue baby with dark hair and a soft cry. What a sweety. They toweled her off a little while she was on me, but for the most part they just let us cuddle. A few minutes later my family wandered back and we're told outside that Rowan Grace was already here! Surprise! They finally took Rowan away to get a bath and the Vitamin K on her eyes and what not, while they did the fun tummy massages (not so fun) I had already birthed out the placenta. The trainee came over to press my stomach, to make sure all parts of the placenta had come out. After a minute we both look down to see a blood clot the size of a softball plop out. I'd never seen a blood clot so big! GAG! When they get so big they have to weigh them. I can't remember how much it weighed but it was really gross.

So Rowan Grace was the quickest, easiest birth. Followed closely by Liam, by mere minutes. The Providence experience was way better than Keiser, but not quite as nice as a home birth. But whatever keeps me and the baby safe!
Sleeping at Providence was way better than Keiser. I got a lot of sleep. And in all Rowan was a super cute baby!

My Evening.

My day had been pretty good. I got Tory to watch all 3 kids while me, Taylor and my mom went to the store. That was fun, care free, kidless, teasing my mom. After Taylor was at work though I got into a pretty sour mood and everything Eli and Liam did flatly pissed me off. Maybe I'm about to start my period. Pfff who knows. I hate these days. Where no matter what I do, I just get too angry and can't get out of it. I can't shake it. And my poor kids, who are just trying to learn how to act and live in this crazy world just kind of get in my way. These are the days where I need to throw on a cartoon, walk outside and say 'God just hit me over the head so I can get back in there and be the loving happy mom my kids need' but Liam never sits down for 3 seconds to watch shows and Eli would be shoving his face in Rowans who would be sitting on the floor screaming because her brothers are flying around her like little circus monkeys after they had a can of redbull. In all the majority of my day consisted of spakings. Lots of spankings. Yelling, then more yelling. Tory saying "jeeze your in a sour mood" and me almost rolling my eyes at her. Wow, I sound like a baby. In the end, I sat in my rv and listened to Eli and Liam, who were supposed to be sleeping, jump around on their bed shouting out that they were superman and batman and that their birthdays were happening and they were giving eachother imaginary birthday presents. All this to tell me "you might have a bad day, and treat your kids in the not so greatest fashion, but in the end they love you and will forget the bad times and revel in the good" shrug off this bad day, tomorrow will still be sunny.

James 2:19

I've been wanting to know where this verse was in the Bible, and now I found it! Score.

"You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder."
James 2:19 NIV

Some people say they "believe in God" but fail to show fruit or actions and a belief system showing their faith is genuine. This verse always comes to mind, even demons believe in God, in Jesus. Even they shudder at His name, and yet there is a set place for them in Hell.

http://bible.com/111/jas.2.19.NIV

Adult problems.

The Webbs got a notice from the city a few days ago saying they'd be charged $3500 if we didn't comply to their codes. Basically we can't have water hookups in our rv.

I have been so stressed and overwhelmed with the road that God has put us in, I'm surprised I don't have ulcers. I have been pushed to my limits, in trusting in Him to know we will be ok. But when I look at my two boys, and think "wow we are living in an rv..." I feel sad and angry that I am not giving them a more comfortable life, that they each don't have their own rooms, that we don't have a nice sized kitchen or a living room to run around in when it rains. I get overwhelmed too easily, too frustrated with our circumstances. I need to stop and enjoy the small things and to see the bigger blessings that God has given us. Like a farm. A garden. A Godly married couple to look up to during these overwhelming times. A chance to rid ourselves of clutter. Closer quarters to cuddle my boys and girl and husband. A home we can get up and move whenever we want. I just have to stop and notice it. And trust me it's hard.

Rowan just pushed out a poop. I'm our like trout.

P.s. I know everything will work out...I just needed to vent that.

A Thursday Morning...

Well my mom burnt her foot last night while I was at Cereal Fest with Crystal and Eli. She was making some boiled eggs, poured the boiling water into a full sink, water splashed off some dishes and pored onto her foot. Poor gal, it's got a decent sized blister (ick) and so when I went back to her house she informed me I'd be picking up taylor from work. He texted at 11:30 saying he wouldn't need to be picked up till 1, so Weenums got to spend the night. Fun evening all around.

Cereal Fest in itself was fun. Cereal, fellowship. We played kick ball in the already warm and muggy gym then took it outside to play some water games with a mop head. Gotta keep youth group classy. Next week we raft the Clackamas and in just 2 weeks it's summer retreat!

Oh yeah, the kittens stormed my rv!

The Aniversery Hike

Today (July 23) Taylor and I began our first overnight hammock camping trip for our 5 year anniversary. We woke up at 7 am struggled out of bed around 7:30, made last minute packing changes and then we were off. Of course our trips couldn't be a trip without forgetting something and having to go to Walmart in Troutdale. Our plan was simple, to head to horsetail falls past multnomah falls and hike up the trail to Oneonta trailhead and do a loop that had some beautiful Vistas and waterfalls. The hike itself was grueling, why did I pick a place that was classed as a difficult double diamond hike? Not only that, my pack had to weigh about 15 pounds more than Taylor's. Who's idea was it to carry all the food!? We clamored through steep switchbacks, or zig zagging paths over rocky terrain. We kept passing and being passed by these two ladies who once offered us some dried mango to which I weezed "noooo....thank you though." The forest was beautiful, the sky partly cloudy which made it nice and cool. After what seemed like hours, because it was, we came to the trailhead that we had been waiting for. The Oneonta pass was dead ahead! We would be able to cross Devils Backbone, a breathtaking ridge with some beautiful views. But did we make it? No. We ended up going off and not being able to find the trail, instead we clamored up an even steeper switchbacked trail, that after climbing straight up for an hour and half, we realized it wasn't right and we had just scaled a random mountain without any beautiful views to reward us. My body was about to give out, I don't know how I had made it as far as I did! My knees were shaking, I was sick to my stomach and my whole body ached and throbbed. I was in a bad place. We decided to call it good and turn around and descend what we had so slowly climbed up. Even though we were going down hill my body had just had enough. We were about to reach the bottom, where a campground lay and our soon to be spot of rest when Taylor made me let him carry my pack. What a hunk. But just as he started running ahead, holding 2 hiking packs on his back and shoulders, these two ladies turned the corner. They said something to Taylor and he said "Oh my wife got tired." I had just taken my shoes off, because my feet were muddy and it was hard to walk and these ladies looked up at me with expressions saying "what a weak sap". Ah well, I smiled at them and passed, ready to sling my body in a nice cool hammock.  We found the campsite a few minutes later. Taylor set up our hammocks while I made a fire and we had some bean and cheese burritos. Uh...yum! The only reason I was greatful for hulking all the stuff in my pack around, was for how good the food was. We then popped open two small boxed wines and toasted our anniversary! Then, at 7 pm I said goodnight to Taylor and went to my hammock and fell asleep. I slept from 7 to 7. 12 hours. It was beautiful. I woke up (July 24th) sweaty and a little chilled, but in all it was so nice! We then boiled water for some homemade oatmeal "packets" which were better than the real thing. So gooood! Then about an hour later we made lunch (lol). We had ravioli with pesto sauce and shaved parmesean cheese and a cup of hot coffe. As I cooked Taylor packed up. The we left. Our small camp of rest. Our bodies sore the previous days brutal accent. But it was worth it. It took half the time getting back to the van and this time we stopped and put  our heads in Horsetail Falls. So refreshing! In all, the mountain won but we learned our limits and now we are at home licking
our wounds.

Back at it...

Got woken up from a deep sleep to Eli grabbing my face and shaking it like a box of cereal. He then looked like he was about to cry and mumbled "where's grandma. I miss her..." Then he crawled up next to me and cuddled. Sometimes I have to look past the rude awakening and love the little moments.

Alissa...it's been a while since you've mentioned that you come on here to see if I have posted anything...and it had been so long since I had written anything that I felt weird and out of place. But I have miss so many memories...I guess it's time to get back at it!

I have had my 3rd kiddo. Rowan Grace Hicks.
Beautiful brown eyes and soft brown hair. A contagious smile. Happier than Eli but a mirror twin of Liam.  Sleeps like a literal baby and only gets grumpy when her brothers shove their faces in her face or if she is hungry.

I am so scared to see her as a teenager. I have already noticed her attachment to the men. I'll be holding her and daddy or grandpa will walk into her line of site and she wants to fly out of my arms to them. Watch out future boys...she does have 2 older brothers and a dad with tattoos...and me...

The biggest change since last I wrote is that we live in an RV now. A 1989 windstar. What a 'bute! The engine turns on great, and nice tiny kitchen, a couch that when you sleep on it you feel like you just rolled on a gravely ground all night, a bed in the back that...if you can believe it...is worse than the couch, a broken bathroom, a non-working fridge and windows everywhere! I love it. I have moments that I hate it. But God has placed us here for a reason. I see it as training for future Missionary work, and currently Patience and Endurance. God's hand will always be in our lives, but sometimes it's hard to look through the difficult circumstances to see where His plan is heading or if He is even there. (Thank you Lord for this chance to be tried and tested in a new and unique way...)
We started out living at my mother-in-laws house which had it's own adventures. But after a few weeks someone must have reported us or the city just took note and gave us a deadline to move. Thankfully God placed in our loves an amazing family. The Webbs. They serve God, through hospitality, in the most tangible way. They opened up their home and farm to us and we went from living in an apartment with a gravel driveway to a 5 acre farm in the span of 2 months. We get to hang out with Chickens, Turkeys, Ducks, Alpaca, now 2 horses (Hucle Buckle is being fostered), a cat, 3 Kittens, 3 dogs and pigs (I named one Phyllis....) In all, God has greatly blessed us.

What does God have in store for my family? I don't know, but I take encouragment that He knows what He is doing and His plan is His and for His glory.

Thanks Alissa, BTW, for being such an amazing and beautiful friend. I love it when you visit me on the farm...and can't wait to bombard your home with all my kids sometime soon. See you at the park tomorrow! Love you :)

Peace out Blogspot. Until next year....